Happy New Year from The Future
I’ve officially been living in Sydney, Australia for 7 months and if you were to read my journal, you’d know that I’ve hated the majority of it. It’s racist, super expensive and it feels like a slightly more seasoned (due to the accents) America. I have no complaints about hostel living, but when 1 month turned into 3 and exploring the city became desperately roaming around in search of work, washing other people’s dishes and cleaning washrooms, I’d had enough. Once again, these grand expectations I had for an unknown country were unfulfilled.
My travel companion and I realized quickly that we weren’t compatible, and I haven’t spoken to her in months. I moved out of the hostel, but now I’m living with roaches the size of my eyeball and people that can’t be bothered to clean up after themselves. I’m truly living in the Land Down Under or the sunken place, I can’t tell the difference anymore.
On the upside, I’ve met some amazing people, I’ve kissed boys from foreign countries, and I’ve watched some of the most beautiful sunsets I will ever see in my lifetime. I’ve travelled to places that I never thought I’d see in my wildest dreams and I’m only barely 25.
NYE is one of my favourite holidays. I love the element of dazzle and glitter, kissing strangers, starting anew and Sydney is famous for putting on one of the world’s largest, most spectacular displays of fireworks. But today I can’t conjure up an ounce of excitement. I was invited to watch the show from a friend of a friend’s apartment that overlooks The Harbour Bridge and I knew that this was a once in a lifetime opportunity, but the second I got home from work, I didn’t want to go anywhere. There’s a grave distinction between being alone and being lonely and today it hit me like a ton of bricks. No family, no love to call my own, and the friends I do have are gone, it’s just me. It sucks.
After reluctantly getting dressed, I headed out the door — Moscato in hand. And I’m so thrilled I did. Tonight, was special, promising even. Watching the clock descend from 10 to 1, reignited my love for the day. I had so much fun! I laughed, I turned strangers into friends, stuffed my face with the most filling finger food and spent the next two weeks finding glitter in places it shouldn’t be. Tonight, I was reminded of the kindness that remains in this world. Could you imagine how miserable my year would have begun if I stayed in my bed sulking? Tragique.
The new year isn’t about dwelling on the past. It’s not a time to relinquish the goals you didn’t accomplish, it’s a reminder that modification is ok. And, the best part of all is that it’s just another day to try again.
I hope this year is kind to you.